Empty vs Hollow

Monday, April 20, 2020


As I was thinking of what to write, the phrase “I am empty” came to mind.

I was not sure about what to write and the sort of eureka moment made me define “I am empty” the same as “I have no idea” or “I am clueless”. After a few seconds of riding along my dreamy brainwaves, I thought, nope. “I am empty” is too positive to represent the feeling I was trying to grasp into words.

To me, when one says that he/she is empty, it implies that there was something there. He/She was emptied. All that once filled him/her up has been spent and freed into the universe. It’s such a beautiful thing when passionate ideas are given life and shared to exist in the world.

As for my present mood, I think it’s more appropriate to say, “I feel hollow.” 

I might’ve thought too hard about what I wanted to write first. And that was what brought me to feel like I didn’t have anything to write, to share, or at least say, in the first place. I felt hollow. As if there was a hole of nothingness – no thoughts, no ideas, no stories.

Maybe one of Tink’s friends or maybe Tinkerbell herself zapped heaps of pixie dust all over me and positivized my perspective. Suddenly, I felt good about feeling hollow. I imagined myself as a brand new cornucopia that’s ready to be filled to the brim.

I am only two steps behind from being empty. I will fill my cornucopia until it overflows. I’ll let it overflow until it becomes empty. Then, I’ll breathe satisfaction and gratitude out into the world, the universe, and the galaxy, for letting me exist and allowing me to share everything I once had.

Eventually, I will feel hollow again. I will see my wholeness as a vessel ready to be filled, to be overflowed, and to be emptied. Over and over again.

***

KAREN’S NOTES
(to self and to anyone who cares to read)

Yup. How I wrote this was basically my thought process.
Slowly sinking into pessimism then abruptly floating towards optimism.
TBH, I overthought a lot and wrote paragraphs that didn’t get to be posted.
But yeah, this is what’s present in my thoughts right now.

TY for reading!


Photo by Milan Popovic on Unsplash

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2 comments

  1. Congrats, Karen!!! Congrats on your new blog and the self-challenge to write and let it all out. Congratulations for being in the 'hollow'. It means your space is ready to get filled with—what? We're also excited to find out!

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  2. Thanks, Inah! Not sure what my "fillings" will be but i guess that's what makes it exciting. And yes, you will find out for sure this time. Cheers to freeing thoughts, ideas, stories, and what not. 😉

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